I am feeling super Christmas-sy. The girls and I spent the morning cutting out paper snowflakes and listening to cheesy Christmas music. A great way to spend the morning - helped by the fact it's snowing outside!
We played out in the snow for a bit when the baby was napping - she's none too keen on how cold it is! And then the girls watched 'Oliver' while I chattered with a friend and her cute 12 week old baby girl.
I've been enjoying a less hectic pace the last couple of days. Slowing down and just enjoying the moment. Getting caught up in the festivities that are coming. The last few weeks I've been pushing myself to do so much. And getting frustrated that I can't do more. Comparing myself to others. People who craft for a living. People who don't have 3 girls to take care of and spend time with.
I've been telling myself I need to do as much as they do. I need to make all these things to sell. And getting stressed at the thought.
Tonight I've realised I need to let that go. While I love painting/sewing/crafting..... it is not my full time job. Maybe in a few years when the girls are grown. But right now my focus is on them. That's not to say that I won't devote some time to painting and making clothes. But not all my time.
I had thoughts of shutting the etsy shop down. I can't compete with others on there, and the things I'm offering are already available, and probably much better.
Then I thought maybe I'd leave it up, and if I make something to go in it, I'll put it there - but put no expectations on myself as to how much I have to make each week or expect to sell a certain amount. Just go back to making things because I enjoy it - and if it sells, well great.
I'm not sure what to do, or what path I'm meant to follow.